karaspeak

Little Aiden is always bound to have something up his sleeve and since he's always around us, he pretty much has knowledge of lots of little (and some big) secrets that get tossed around our household by us and those who pass through. I always wonder what he would do if he really did understand all that was being said and really did have all the knowledge he could have by just being around the right people at the right time...oh my, wouldn't that be the day!


But Aiden has a secret that he wanted me to share since he can't email quite yet. I mean, we're working on it, but right now, accomplishing "hello" and "goodbye" in one scenario seems challenging enough. So, as I am his "voice," I shant tarry too long on his message.



Yes, yes, it's true. No, your eyes are not fooling you. Surprise of all surprises, Aiden is going to be a BIG BROTHER! Baby Tabler Number Two is on his or her way into our world and is planning to make a debut is March 2010. We wanted to wait until we spilled the beans to our families (hence his t-shirt) before we made the announcement to the "world." After hearing for nearly two years we would not even be able to have children (at least through natural methods), it is more than a miracle to be blessed with another child on top of the one incredibly healthy, beautiful, and amazingly amazing baby boy we already have in our lives.


I'll post the picture of our little "gummy bear" after we have more pictures - our next visit to the doctor is September 14. I am squeaking through my first trimester and so far feel pretty great. It's hard to believe I'm pregnant most of the time...I kind of just pinch myself to remember. We are shocked, but are excited to share the news of our next bundle of joy who'll join us in the spring...shortly before Aiden turns two. We will have TWO under TWO...this just sounds scary to me, but hopefully we're in the "game" enough to remember what we did with round one to do okay with round two!


I don't think any of us, including Aiden, are quite sure what to expect as this new addition joins our little family. Thank you in advance for your prayers as we journey through the next 28 weeks to a healthy delivery.

As I sit here, I realize the last time I wrote was at the beginning of August...apparently not much was going on, but here I sit, three weeks later, and August is gone. Though we didn't travel a lot in August, we had our fair share of things going on, just not in the most "expected" ways.

We dealt with the loss of our summer Nanny, Emily, who was so great and who really loved Aiden so so much. They had a great summer together and lots of great memories at the pool and in the neighborhood. Lucky for us, she's teaching right around the corner and living in the neighborhood, so she's already been able to babysit...which is great to have.

We faced the project of finding a new Nanny, which we thought we did in mid-July, but due to a series of complications, things changed with her ability to help us. We were devastated more so because we knew how perfect of a find she was and how super she would be with Aiden, but also because she was sick...and we don't like for anyone to be sick. While we went on the search for a new Nanny, she found out her treatments were going to be less invasive than the previous time, therefore allowing her to help us on a part-time basis! Hooray!! So, Liz started with us the week of August 24, and Aiden took right to her. HE LOVES HER! They have a great time together and she loves on him all day...which as a Mom that has to work, makes you feel GREAT that someone is loving on your sweet boy all day. Liz is amazing.

We dealt with the loss of a dear and precious friend, Doctor Don Hines. This man was essentially like a second dad to Nathan, in fact, he and his wife both refer to he and I as their "adpoted son and daughter" when introducing us to anyone. Without hesitation, we are their adopted kids. We went to Birmingham in the middle of the month to visit with him at the hospital he was being treated at. He was sent home with Hospice care the following weekend and passed away just two weeks after. To be able to visit with Doc and Candace two weeks before he passed in Birmingham was absolutely priceless. Though not the most ideal of circumstances, it was a great day for us to spend telling stories, hearing about life, and getting what we thought to be our last hugs before he headed to be with our Father. Nathan and I went to the funeral last weekend in Troy while Aiden stayed here with Emily. The funeral was that of a true cowboy. He had this phrase, "the cowboy way" that defined his life and his work ethic. He was an amazing man who was loved by many and who impacted more than I can count. To see the love shown and the joy displayed by those who came to say goodbye was something I will never be able to put into words, but am so grateful to have been able to see in person. I will not soon forget it.

You can read a bit about him here: http://business.troy.edu/TroyCampus/News/NewsDetail.aspx?NewsID=200300066

Mix all that in with a flair of family drama and you all of a sudden have one full month. So, as August closes, and September begins, and as we move from the heat of summer to the cool of fall, I begin the countdown to 3-0. Yes, 30. In a mere 23 days, I will no longer be "living free in my 20's." I have no doubt this year will carry with it some great things and exciting changes...and I look forward with anxious anticipation to what those are.

Not much has been going on at our household the past few weeks, which is some ways has been kind of nice. In other ways, I think it only exists as the calm before the storm of life is inevitably going to kick up again. What I've been struck with most recently is why it is that we fear the unknown or just fear in general whether "it" be known or not. And even though I have this amazing track record with God, who's shown me time and time again that my fear is unnecessary because He's got me and there is no fear in Him....I still find msyelf there sometimes. I would say with my own life fear tends to manifest itself more in the form of "worry" rather than actual fear of __________ (fill in the blank), but neither of these are good to carry around and should be squelched as quickly as possible because they only tend to grow, not dissipate, over time. And as they grow, it lessens our ability to remember the times when God brought us out of fear and into light as we move through change, tough times, and hardship.

So, here I find myself in a place where I fear, not necessarily anything in particular other than just what lies ahead and how in the world it's all going to shake out. To overcome it, and remind myself how faithful God has been, how many times He's proven himself to me, and how little I have to actually fear, I took the time to write out what it is I fear, or what I worry about most. It was a much longer list than I suspected. Either that, or most of my fear boiled down to only a few simple core things. Isn't that the way it is? Though all of our fears tend to look different on the outside, most all of the little fears boil down to a few simple core things when we really take the time to sit down and rationalize them. After I did that, I went back and wrote down all the times God has brought me through a time of unknown, a time of hardship, and all the places and times when He has proven most faithful. This list was long, like way more than twice the length of my fear list. This simple fact alone should tell me I have nothing to fear but fear itself. Okay, that is cliched, but really...shouldn't that be enough to remind me of all the times He's proven me wrong and come through when I thought there was no hope? That question begs another. If indeed He has come through time and time again, why do we still let fear creep in during those uncertain times?

While I can't indefinately answer that question, I do think it has to do with our mistrust of His goodness to us. That this time our good luck could be up. That we've worn out our welcome. Finally asked too much of him, so much so that he is revoking his grace. Oh, the list could go on. But the reality is, if you go back and look at your life again, you'll see he's never let you down. Even in the times when it looked like he did in the moment, the outcome was so much more than you could have ever expected it would be. The same goes for all of history, just check it, it's in the Bible...time after time of his faithfulness overcoming fear. So as I work through this fear and finger by finger unleash the hold I think I have on it, I realize my best interest is what he has in mind. What is the worst that could happen? At the end of the day I still have my amazing family, a life full of love, and something better on the other side. It's just the waiting part that's tough. But, if I sit back and relax, remember how many times he's shown up for me and how awesome the outcome has been, all that can happen is experience sheer and utter freedom. How can I be afraid of that?

So, fear and worry, get on on the street. No room for you here. Go find someone else to haunt and teach them how to throw you out too. It's about all you're good for anyway.